Why is my new pet  acting weird?

Because it’s Day 1. They're not weird. They're overwhelmed. Think of the 3-3-3 Rule: 3 Days to decompress (aka the “Shelter Hangover”). 3 Weeks to learn your routine. 3 Months to finally exhale and feel home.

Can I snuggle them immediately?

Easy there, Romeo. Over-handling too soon — kisses, face-cupping, picking them up, squeezing their adorable cheeks — can freak them out. Let them make the first move. Consent matters… even in pet parenting.Best move: Bring them home, give them a quiet space, and let them just exist for a bit. They’re decompressing from a stressful shelter stay. Likely they need to sleep for 3 days. It's a shelter hangover.

Should I introduce them to my kids, neighbors, dogs, mailman and ex’s cousin on Day 1?

Hard no. They do not need to meet the cast of your entire life yet. Wait a minimum of 3 quiet days before adding new people, pets, or surprises.Introduce as few new things as possible. Slow is safe. Give them three days of quiet before you expand their world. Safe is successful. We actually recommend you give them a week to adjust if possible. 

Should I give them a bath right away?

Picture this: First date. They barely know you. And suddenly… you’re washing their armpits?  Yeah — no.  Skip the shampoo. Break the ice with treats, not tub time.

Can I leave them home alone right away?

Imagine being dropped at a stranger’s house and told, “Good luck!” Not great, right? Stick around the first few days. Be their comfort human. Let them check out the surroundings without hovering, think peeking into the rooms as they check things out. Let them come to you for the first month. 

Why is structure so important?

Because dogs love rules even more than belly rubs. A crate isn’t punishment — it’s a safe bedroom. Routine builds confidence. Predictability builds trust. Structure = security (And a lot fewer messes.)

My new dog is scared. Should I cuddle harder?

Nope. Tucked tail, shaking, hiding — that’s fear, not “I need more snuggles.” Over-coddling can accidentally reward fear or even create guarding.Too much “it’s okay, sweetie” at the wrong moment can lead to resource guarding or increased insecurity. Give them calm, predictable space instead. Let them come to you on their own time. Offer calm space. Let them come to you when they’re ready.

Why is my dog totally different from how they acted at the shelter?

Because shelters are loud, scary, stressful planets. You’re seeing their survival mode, not their soul. Their real personality shows up over time — usually around the 3-week mark.

Can we go on adventures right away? Road trip? Brewery? Dog park?

Absolutely not. They just learned where their water bowl is. We know you are excited, we are too, but we want to set your pet up for success, not failure. Overstimulation will bring problems.  First week = home, quiet, routine. Save the adventures for once trust has formed.

When will they love me?

Love doesn’t always start with fireworks. Sometimes it starts with: A crusty blanket fort. Awkward silences. Side-eye worthy of a telenovela. A mutual agreement not to make sudden moves. But if you give it time, space and patience? You’ll end up with the best relationship of your life.

BOTTOM LINE

When in doubt…
Slow it down
Give space
Add structure
Keep expectations realistic
Let the dog set the tempo

You’re not just fostering or adopting.
You’re becoming the bridge from scared to safe — and we adore you for it.